1. Beach s*x
This one is a stereotypical fantasy. There is just something romantic about having s*x on the beach, your romp lit only by the stars above. The trouble is sand. Sand gets everywhere. Everywhere! And sand creates friction, and friction ruins s*x. Imagine rubbing your man-hood against sandpaper, and you’ll see why this one is better left to the imagination
2. Road Head
I am not quite sure where the allure of road head comes from; we men seemingly love to get a blow-job during any activity, so why not driving? Because it’s many times more distracting than texting, that’s why. Leave aside the very real possibility that, in a moment of ecstasy, you lose control of your car and injure another human being. You’ll be lucky if your pen*s escapes without bite marks. And if that’s not enough to make you think twice, consider how you’ll fill out your insurance claim!
3. s*x in a car
Like many of the s*x acts on this list, you’ll want to try this one at least once, if only for the reward of novelty. And like all of the s*x acts on this list, things could go very well. You might be driving along with your wife and spontaneously decide to pull over to the side of a deserted road for a moment of passion. But from the moment you both enter that cramped backseat and spend minutes fumbling for the best position, you’ll come to see the difference between fact and fiction. There is no comfortable way to have s*x in a car, unless you happen to drive a tank or a Bentley.
4. Using Mirrors
Mirrors enable us to replicate part of the voyeurism of p****graphy in the bedroom, and in theory that sounds great, but rather than focusing on how great your partner looks, chances are you’ll be thinking about all the many excuses you came up with to skip the gym or indulge in that late-night snack. And that is a very quick way to kill the mood
5. 69
This one at least makes sense. You and your wife or husband both enjoy the pleasures of great oral s*x, so why not save on time and kill two birds with one stone? The problem is, instead of doubling your pleasure, you’re both going to give half-assed performances marked by lapses in concentration and severe neck pain.
6. Hot-Tub s*x
For whatever reason, hot tubs scream s*x. Maybe it’s because in movies they’re often the spot where orgies originate. But here’s what to expect: uncomfortable hot water that is a breeding ground for bacteria, awkward fumbling to get into position and avoid the jet streams, and a messy, messy aftermath that will have you jumping out of the water faster than a shark sighting. Follow @africanewspost
