Of course, they don’t succeed he quickly added. He recounted how an incident where newly married woman came to his office and brazenly told him: “ I am not wearing panties” The Bishop in his 50s said he ran out of the office and sought refuge in the car park where other visitors were waiting to see him. “We are all men, and sometimes the temptation to sin is too much, he said, adding that a month can never pass before a woman makes a pass at him.
When they greet you, they hold your hands longer than necessary. Some come to your office late in the evening, and when we are out on seminars, some will even want to come to your room late in the night, saying they have problems they want to share with you, “ he revealed. He added that some women send him suggestivemessages, which he promptly shows his wife. “She always goes and talks to them, and they never bother me again.
I can’t get a funny message from a woman and hide it from my wife.” “Most of the women who are on my case are married. They have no problems at home but just want to sleep with me. They also don’t want any money from me,” said the man of God.
Temptations do occur a lot in the church, and many good men who serve the Lord have fallen by the wayside, but the bishop said it takes prayers to remain steadfast. The allure around a pastor is enticing for some women. The eloquence of the man in the pulpit, the grandeur, big cars, and fancy houses that most pastors flaunt also attract women.
Like many powerful men, pastors have women flocking around them. According to psychologist Karen Kimani, it is the power that makes them stand out or set them apart. She says pastors seem to have a lot of money, they control many people, hence the image of power.
She, however, says it is usually unlikely that a woman would be attracted to a pastor because of money. It is survival of the fittest concept, and if a man is powerful, it means he can provide for the woman and her children. “There could also be the thrill of doing something forbidden, that is sleeping with another woman’s husband, who is also a pastor,” says Kimani.
Pastor (Dr) Esther Obasi-ike of the Redeemed Christian Church of God says she does not worry about other women who may be interested in her husband Pastor Prince Obasi-ike because being a God fearing man, he knows how to handle such pressures.
According to her “ There is no single man anywhere who doesn’t have admirers but the difference is in the relationship between those men and God.
I have always known that my husband is accountable first to God, the family and then to the Church of Jesus Christ; hence he can’t do anything that may embarrass any of those.” But how would she handle ‘bad’ ladies with wrong motives in the church? Would she chase them away from church or warn them? “Those are petty issues. At my level I don’t deal with such petty issues.
“However, if there is a credible information about any lady attempting any mischief, as a church we have a procedure for handling such human beings. As much as possible we teach the undiluted word of God from the pulpit and expect it to bring transformation in the hearts of people,” she says. House of Grace pastor, Dickson Waime says pastors also have challenges just like any other human being because “everybody comes to you, as a pastor, with his problems and you are on call anytime, day or night. It’s an enormous responsibility”.
As a pastor, he says, when he is under pressure, he talks to God for guidance and seeks the guidance of his mentor, Bishop David Muriithi. He reveals that at House of Grace, the church doctrines discourage in the strongest terms the issue of male pastors counselling females, especially when the subject matter is about intimacy or relationships.
“It’s easier for a female pastor to counsel a female member of the congregation, unless it is really a must that the only available pastor is a man,” says Waime. He says as a pastor, he always tries to remain professional but at the same time try and be compassionate, not to appear distant and unmoved. On the issue of females wearing revealing or tight clothes in church, Pastor Waime says House of Grace doesn’t set rules when it comes to dressing but all church leaders model decency in their dressing and uphold the highest level of ethics.
“We preach about decency, we practise decency and worshippers also follow the same route. You don’t need rules to guide you on what to wear,“ he says. A few years back, Apostle James Ng’ang’a of Neno Evangelism
Bishop Thomas Wahome of Helicopter of Christ Church, on his part, says at his church, he has an open office, visible to everybody. “When I am with someone in my office, anybody in the church can see who is in my office, although they can’t hear what we talk about. I do this to avoid unfortunate situations.
Of course, there are scenarios where women try to lure the pastor, and being principled is the way out,” says Wahome, adding that the devil always tempts people in an area they have a weakness. “Pastors didn’t fall from heaven, they were born by women just like you and me, and they are human, too. They can be tempted, and they can fall.
Instead of condemning them, we should forgive them and help them back on the path to righteousness,” he says. Bishop David Oginde of Christ is the Answer Ministries (Citam) says whenever pastors have problems, the best people to lay their hearts bear to are fellow clergy, or respected peers within the congregation. On the matter of seductive dressing by women folk in the church, Bishop Oginde believes that the Bible has already addressed the issue and people should follow the teachings in the Bible.
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