OH NO, NOT AGAIN!!! KENYA'S MOST CONTROVERSIAL WRITER NJOKI CHEGE VICIOUSLY REV. KATHY KIUNA TELLING HER AND HER FLOCK THE BITTER TRUTH

Listen. Just because that church can afford to buy airtime on Sunday mornings to air their hogwash on national TV, does not mean that church is the ultimate church. And just because your pastor drives an expensive car and holidays in South Africa does not mean they are blessed and successful. First of all, who lied to you that material possession is equal to blessing. Isn’t blessings the peace of mind, family, love, and good health?

My dear, that Range Rover your ‘daddy pastor’ is driving is not a blessing. That is stolen property bought with your money. That is not a successful and blessed daddy pastor living in Runda. That is a thug handling stolen property. Hold your curses for later. I am just getting started. Listen, you illogical ‘son and daughters of whoever’. You don’t need a female pastor to pray for you to get a husband. You don’t need a conman or conwoman to pray for your husband to stop coming home at 2am smelling of fresh lodging soap. You don’t need a pastor to be your spiritual mother or father.

God is all you have and He is all you will ever need. You also need to stop being silly, get on your goddamn knees and pray for yourself and your family. Look here, you dimwits who flock those ‘modern’ churches where people ‘live-tweet’ and ‘sub-tweet’ each other during service and tagging their pastors. You don’t need that semi-illiterate conman to come lay hands on you or ground break that kaproject in shagz for God’s blessings. Come on, God is just a prayer away and you don’t need to consult a deluded ex-convict or former house girl who has never been to a Theology class before you embark on an investment.

I will tell you the truth even as you throw tantrums all over social media. Those pastors you people worship and adore are humans like you. They tell you not to drink alcohol but you should see them in golf clubs gulping expensive whiskey and cognac.

They tell you not to c0mmit @dult3ry but you should get a printout of their phone records and S0d0m and G0m0rrah will get a new meaning. They tell you to stay faithful to your wife but you don’t know what their wives go through-but cannot talk because there is a certain image they want to uphold. Some of those pastors you run to for marital advice are on the verge of divorce and they are only tolerating each other for the sake of their business – the church.

Inviting that kapastor to your home and hosting them for dinner, tweeting and re-tweeting nice things about them is not a ticket to heaven. You must think I am an atheist. Well you are not the first to make that mistake. I am a proud and proper Presbyterian who believes that religion and life must follow certain set practice and procedure. Go figure it out.

Let the curses begin. One at a time please.
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